Love and Compassion

“Love and Compassion, qualities of a committed spiritual practice. We are all human and walking through this life with lessons to learn and share, let´s facilitate this by standing together as a community of loving hearts supporting each other´s processes. We all learn from mistakes, what is truly important is to recognize, take responsibility, learn and change…”

These were the first words that came to my mind as I opened the space and time for reflection about the recent events happening in my life and in the midst of the latest turmoil going on in the Anusara Yoga community.

During the last few months I have become skilled at stopping to make conscious efforts to be aware of my emotional processes as well as the processes of people around me. I am just working constantly do my best at responding to situations instead of reacting to them and in doing so, there is a greater chance for being assertive, which I consider a very important skill to practice and cultivate.

This particular subject about love and compassion keeps coming up in different and many forms and ways. I have had to come back to those two spiritual qualities time and again, as my heart has been broken about three times in the last seven months or so; this applies to all situations, not just romantic type of relationships; this also applies to any type of human relationships, I also had put this into practice in some friendships as for the past year I have had to live with many people since I left my apartment in Costa Rica -in which I lived alone- and have been traveling/living in between places and establishing in a new city, making major changes in my life.

It has taken a great deal of desire and will power to act from the highest possible way, to put myself in the other person´s shoes to be able to understand their reasons/motivations for acting the way they do, which unfortunately happen to be sometimes their reactions and other times choices that have brought disappointment and pain for me. In such circumstances, I have chosen to give the situations time and space to facilitate insights, healing and growth. I have let go of any feelings of anger, sadness and can happily say I do not hold any grudges for anyone; but choosing to act in this way is not necessarily easy.

One great reflection I had that helped me see things from this perspective I am talking about is one I wrote a couple of months ago:

“Often times, people reveal a lack of inner connection to their deepest truths, which in turn causes pain to everyone involved, easily resulting in resentment, hard feelings & usually bringing about unskillful choices as a response. Always remember that how others choose to act is a reflection of the path they are on and the lessons they have to learn, by doing so you will step into the flow of Love bringing Compassion to the situation and facilitating growth for everyone.”

This is how I have managed not to take things personal and stay open, understanding it is always part of the reality of the process people are going through. It has not been easy to make the effort to decide not to become a victim, blame the other person, or resent them for the “rejection” or the “betrayal”- The trick lies in finding a way to be skillful enough to choose to see it as a learning experience, a growing process through a path that we are all walking along; instead of interpreting events in a way that cause pain, hard feelings or make the problem bigger, just take the time to reflect on it, and fathom the hidden lesson.

Don´t get me wrong, during these processes, I experienced anger, sadness, frustration and even at times lost the hope and faith of things actually being better in the future; those are all valid human emotions. What is important is to stay fully open to experience all of those unpleasant emotions without getting trapped in any of them for too long. Once the pain has been felt, then there comes the time for reflection, compassion and forgiveness. As you start to understand that most people are doing the best they can, at any given moment; and that no one really is purposefully looking into creating interactions which will damage a relationship, bring pain, sadness and damage others. Well, for the most part, most people are not purposefully doing that; though in certain cases some people do; and that as well comes from a place of deep hurting, not of clarity and awareness, and definitely not from skillful choices; it is a direct reflection of the pain and lack of assertiveness they hold deep inside their heart.

Putting people on a pedestal is dangerous, in the sense that you are setting yourself up for disappointment, because as stated before; we are all HUMAN and as such, we are going to make mistakes. We are here to learn about ourselves, to raise our awareness, not only for our own good, but for the good of the entire existence of this Universe, as the vibrational levels that you reach with your thoughts and emotions are expanded around you. People in your life are teachers, all of them; same as the only way you can look at yourself is by stepping in front of a mirror, which is what we do in a physical sense; but in an emotional/psychological sense, the only way we can see at ourselves is by the reflection we get from the interactions with everyone around us.

So in any and every situation, there is the opportunity to learn something about yourself, remember that meanings are shown with time and time has the ability to heal and show true colors. So, what to do when so many questions arise, personal values and doubts are brought to one´s attention? Take time, time to sit with yourself, look at your reasons and real motivations, your emotions and thoughts, notice them all and be true to what really matters to you, and before taking any action, notice if it is a reaction coming from a place of anger/resentment or, or if it is the best skilled response coming from love and compassion in your heart; which you first have to feel for yourself and can then extend to others. It is easier said than done, but we all have this capacity, it is a matter of cultivating it. I wish you take the time to dig deep inside of you, connect with all your truths and choose to act from Love; it feels good! :: ))

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